Nothing says magic to me like cutting off part of your ear. Well folks, thats
exactly what magician David Blaine did, after being asked by a reporter to perform a magic trick. This took place just a few
weeks before he stepped into a box in London
for 44 days, with only water and a journal, in order to prove his master wizardry to the entire world. Gandalf he aint. I
dont know about you, but I dont think the word magic comes to mind when I think about Blaines
latest attempt at idiocy, err, magic. Im pretty sure that if an award for Master Idiot was given out this year (hosted, of
course, by Billy Crystal), Mr. Blaine would win, hands down. The problem with Blaine is that hes more or less a glorified
extra on Jackass. Worse yet, hes the
guy on Jackass who grosses everyone out by doing pointless stunts. Watch out Steve-O,
here comes Blaine-O. What baffles me more about Blaine is that he has a following of thousands. Why? I dont see anything special
about a man who likes to bring pain and torture onto himself without bringing to it, some sort of an eternal message other
than, Hey, look at me, Im cool.
Master magician David Copperfield is a man who understands magic. Sure, hes a bit of a freak himself, but at least
hes aware it and, most importantly, okay with it. He does his little trick on primetime television in front of youthful onlookers
like myself and then its done. Everyone claps and cheers and all is calm in the world of magic. Now weve got David Blaine,
a man who takes his magic seriously. Heres a guy who really needs to look up the word magic. What makes magic, magic is that
the trick is actually an illusion. Its not real, it never was, nor will it ever be. With Blaine,
everythings real, right down to the cutting of his ear.
To be honest, I followed Blaines little Im going to be in a box for 44 days or as Blaine refers to it, the Above the
Below trick, mainly just because I figured the world would be rid of him for 44 days. I actually thought about having a David
Blaine is gone party when news
broke. I thought, maybe hed go insane while hes in there or better yet, hed realize that what hes doing isnt bloody magic!
Now, it seems, Blaine has achieved an almost cult status from this stunt. People watch him all day, including several big
name stars including a rather embarrassed Sir Paul McCartney. His followers and onlookers grow day by day as do his enemies.
Ive recently read that Blaine has been harassed by the crowds that have gathered
around his box which presides over the River Thames. They pelt eggs and tomatoes and other innocent veggies and produce. One
guy harassed him with a paint balloon while another flew a helicopter around his box.
I wonder, whats point of inflicting hatred upon Blaine's
box? I guess its all an extension of sur-reality. People like to watch even if the person they watch is a complete doof and
they hate him. Seriously though, whats the big deal about a guy in a box? Better yet, whats the big deal about an idiot in
a box? I think some homeless people live in boxes without food and other human contact. Why dont we watch them? At least theyre
not idiots. Yeah theyre life situation isnt filled with happy colors, but hey, theyve got more dignity than Blaine.
Let us hope that Blaines next trick doesnt involve someone sawing him in half.
The results could be quite messy.